Johnson Family Funnies (Episode 3)

I have been having to take a lot of tums lately for my heartburn! The other night, as we were getting ready for bed, I asked Micah to bring me one. And Kobe, serious as could be, sit ups with his hand on his heart, takes a deep breath, and said “My need one too! My heart burning!”

Kobe loves to fight his sleep. The other night he was asking to watch tv “just for a minute”. I finally told him we could read one story and for him to pick a book. He proceeds to tell me he wants to read the Bible. Like, my bible. Not a kids story bible. The real, actual, King James Bible. I tried to get him to pick something different and I finally looked at Micah and is just watching us and said, “I’m just trying to figure out how you’re gonna tell our kid we can’t read the Bible!”

SO we read the Bible. I flip it open and find a random short story about how Jesus stopped the water at the Jordan for the people to cross. I read the real, KJV of the story, and he actually sits and listens. I retell it to him when we are done in a way that I think he will understand. The next day, he is telling his GraGra and Pops about the story he read…but with a little add lib! He said, “The people were trying to cross and God STOPPED (real dramatic here) that wa-wa so the sharks and the alligators couldn’t get them!!”

Oh and the story of Baby Moses in the Basket has alligators in it, too, according to Kobe!

Kobe was sitting beside me on the couch and start poking and shaking my leg and said “why is it so squishy?”

At Walmart pickup, the man loading the car had a big beard and Kobe said, “who that man mama??? That man with the whiskers?!”

Leaving the ballgame, mama is carrying Kobe and she says, “Whew!! Yall should have let me go get the car! Carrying Kobe is hard!” Kobe says, “COME ON GRA-GRA!!! YOU GOT THIS!!!!”